After I Got Diagnosed With Diabetes, My Relationships Changed—Here's How

How Type 2 Diabetes Changed My Relationships.

Getting diagnosed with type 2 diabetes can be life-changing. This change can involve taking new medications or adjusting your diet, but it can also affect your personal relationships. Health’s Type 2 Diabetes Advocate, Alysse Dalessandro, shares how her relationships evolved after her diagnosis and what she learned from these experiences.

When Alysse first heard the words, "You have type 2 diabetes," nine years ago, she knew her life would change—but she hadn't anticipated how deeply her relationships would be affected.

Already working as a plus-size writer, content creator, and body positivity advocate, Alysse was used to addressing misconceptions about type 2 diabetes and people in larger bodies. She had ready responses for online trolls claiming she was bound to get diabetes. However, navigating personal relationships post-diagnosis was an entirely different challenge. She realized she needed to educate herself on type 2 diabetes to advocate for herself and others in all areas of her life.

Relationships With Coworkers

Alysse once overheard a coworker joking, "I just ate so many cupcakes, I got diabetes," followed by laughter from others. Although the joke was likely seen as harmless, it was painful for someone living with diabetes.

At the time, Alysse was newly diagnosed and not very close to these coworkers. She chose not to confront them, but it changed how much she shared at work. Her advice: protect your peace and be cautious about who you disclose your diagnosis to.

Relationships With Friends

Hearing a close friend call a sugary drink "diabetes in a glass" hurt more than hearing it from strangers. Alysse gently corrected him, explaining that sugar alone doesn't cause diabetes and highlighting the role of genetics. Her friend was grateful for the information and changed his perspective, even correcting others since then.

Alysse learned that it's worth the effort to educate friends. While they may never fully understand living with diabetes, a good friend will listen and learn.

Relationship With Partners

When Alysse told her then-partner about her diagnosis, his response was, "I'm sure you feel like this is a death sentence." This reaction was not what she needed to hear, and the relationship ended soon after.

Spending time single allowed Alysse to grieve her old life and learn how to live fully with diabetes. Eventually, she married someone who also lives with type 2 diabetes, which deepened her understanding that diabetes affects everyone differently. Even when eating the same meal, their glucose levels varied.

Your partner doesn't need to have diabetes to be supportive. What matters is having someone who believes in your ability to live a fulfilling life.

Relationships With Family

Growing up in an Italian-American household where food was central, Alysse often heard, "Do you really need to eat that?"—a question that intensified after her diagnosis.

She recognized that family concern came from love, but their fears were not her burden to carry. Setting boundaries became crucial. Working with a nutritionist who understood eating disorders empowered her to navigate intuitive eating and confidently assert control over her health decisions.

Relationship With the Medical System

As a child with a larger body, Alysse experienced doctors using fear to encourage weight loss. She knew that weight stigma could affect the quality of healthcare.

When diagnosed with diabetes, she advocated for a weight-neutral approach focused on managing her A1C rather than her weight. Her primary care doctor supported this, sought additional resources, and educated herself, creating a positive healthcare experience.

This taught Alysse that it’s worth advocating for the type of care you deserve.

Relationship With Myself

Alysse believes in the idea, "You teach people how to treat you." As she grew more confident in managing her diabetes, she became better at advocating for herself.

Understanding the genetic component of diabetes helped her move past feelings of shame and empowered her to educate others without internalizing misconceptions.

Being your own best advocate starts with trusting yourself as the expert on your body. No one knows better than you how sleep, stress, or activity levels impact your glucose.